URGENT: Leaving Voicemails

This is me listening to your stupid voicemail.

Okay haters, it's time I address you.

Please, DO NOT call my cell phone, get prompted to my voicemail, and then go in to an emotional tirade about how I'm so hard to get a hold of, not a good friend, need to be around my phone, or scream, "OH MY GOD" in to it. 

Okay, I have a busy life right now. If I can't get to my phone, it's because I am in class, working, or sleeping. Get over it. Seriously. Some people nap. Some people go to class. Some people work. 

Most of you know this, but I feel like I needed to get it out there. Seriously, stop calling me if you're just going to be heartbroken that I don't answer your needs every time you call. That is all.

Britney's New Video Looks Like It Was Made on iMovie

Okay, so Britney's new video for Gimme More was released at 12am and was the No.1 downloaded music video on iTunes in like 5 minutes or something. Clearly her career is no where near ending like all the critics think. I promise this site will NOT become a Britney site, but because I've been infatuated with her career as of late, I feel that I should just let you know why.

Anyway, check out that screen shot on the left from her new video! How hot is she!? I didn't think I would like her with darker hair but she looks really, really good. I'm impressed. Throughout the entire video she looks REALLY good actually. 

The video itself is pretty disappointing however. All she is doing is swinging around on a stripper pole. The cinematography is awesome though. It's basically all shot from the perspective of a drunk onlooker. Creative, I guess.

However, I believe I could make that entire video on my Mac and make it look exactly like that, if not better. I thought that for such a huge step in her career we would be seeing something a little more edgy, but I guess people have enough shit to talk about regarding her personal life, that her career is not as interesting as it used to be.

Congratulations Britney for being at No.1 on 4 different charts right now! 

Ew I sound like such a gay-bo.

Love, John

No I Don't Want 2% Cow Milk From Your Granny's Farm, Thank You Very Much

Does this look like an animal from which you want to be suckling teet juices? 

The answer is no.

Tonight at work a grown ass man came in to work and was asking about every single thing on the menu. He had a tie-dyed green shirt on with little stick figures with dreadlocks that read, "Jamaican Me Crazy."

Right away I knew I wanted to jump out of the nearest window, but I continued on with his order. One after the other he kept asking me, "What kind of drink is this?" Did I mention he was talking like he was 5 years old? He talked very slowly, and was trying to like figure words out in his head, which, in my opinion is disrespectful. 

Anyway, as he finally is done asking me what espresso is, and how it is incorporated in to a latte, he tries to tell me that he owns a coffee shop back home. So, anyway I ask him, "Would you like 2% or skim milk in that?"

His response, "Oh yeah, 2%. Back home where my granny's farm is, we have a cow that produces 2% milk. You guys 'oughtta come down here some time. It's 117 Maple Street. Back home on my Granny's farm is the best milk." Keep in mind it took him about 3 minutes to say that entire sentence. No lie.

Ayumi and Mike (the other two with whom I am working) both look at me immediately, expecting some sort of reaction. My response:

"Oh, well thanks anyway but I have plenty of 2% milk here at my discretion. Have a good night!" and I hand him his latte. THEN...he says, "Yeah I'm just going to stick around while this thing cools off."

Uh, I steamed the milk to 160 degrees, that thing isn't cooling down anytime soon. So, then he wants whipped cream, blah blah blah.

"Okay, whipped cream. Check! Have a good night," I say as I am handing him his drink again.

"Alright, you too. Come to my granny's farm, we have Jamaican and Italian coffee beans," he says as he turns the corner and is out of sight. I look over at Ayumi and Mike and they are beat red, laughing their asses off.

Not funny. Think about this next time you eat your cereal, ya'll.

I Need Britney Rehab

Okay so I'm just going to come clean here and admit that I REALLY like Britney's new single "Gimme More." It seems like all we do is hear about what she's doing wrong anymore, but her new single is No.1 on two separate iTunes charts, which is saying something. 

I'm partly infatuated with this woman and I have absolutely no idea why. I've been venturing in to her other recordings and find myself humming them to myself. And, by humming them to myself I mean singing very loudly in the shower like I'm about to start a world tour. It's sick.

Anyway, she stole my look. I buzzed my hair last October, and shortly thereafter, you can see what happened. She's definitely a fug in this picture, but why do I still love her?

Tonight I came home from work and found her interview with that disgusting pig Matt Lauer on YouTube. He just keeps grilling her, and being very annoying. You can tell that the questions were generated by the ratings producers rather than himself. Matt Lauer seems like a nice guy, I don't think he would keep pressing Britney's buttons. Anyway, she ended up crying and I felt really bad for her.

I think I need to go to Britney Rehab to get detoxed from this. I don't think it's healthy that I am so infatuated with her. Speaking of infatuation, how about Chris Crocker!? I ran in to him RIGHT before his video about leaving Britney alone became ridiculously huge. I think he's one of the funniest people out there. If you separate the fact that he dresses like a woman and actually listen to some of the stuff he is saying, it is actually very interesting, and I respect him for opening his mouth and taking on subjects that most people aren't ballsy enough to say.

Anyway, enough about all this hype. It's late and I need to go bed. I love you.

Oh yeah, Johnny was inspired by my writing and started a blog that you can read here. Check it out!

Morgantown Weather!

Here is my widget forecasting the next week of my life. Could it be any better than this!? 

Sorry, I am just really happy about this.

P.F. Chang's Should Be A Religion

Umm holy cow. P.F. Chang's is AMAZING! Definitely my new favorite place to eat.

I went to Pittsburgh for an over night holiday of sorts to visit Kate. We went to P.F. Chang's that night to vent about our horrible weeks. Well, I was the one ranting I should say because this past week was definitely one of the worst ones I have had in a long time. 

Anyway, after Kate and I cracked each other up saying the stupidest things, we finally went to bed...where I slept like a baby for the first time in a really long time. However, yesterday I had a kink in my neck which was made worse because I played tennis on it in the cold air, and pulled it. Today it is a little better but it still hurts during certain motions. :( 

Anyway if you want to buy me an awesome Christmas gift, a $500 gift card to P.F. Chang's would be the perfect gift!

Also, I will be posting my wish list again this year and everyone can take heed. I'm stingy.

iLove Baltimore

So I just got back from a weekend in Baltimore with some good friends! I have to say it was definitely one of the best weekends I have had in a really long time.

Andrew and I wanted to have a weekend to just relax and chill out, so Baltimore seemed like the most obvious choice. We met up at my Dad's first so I could leave my car there, and took one car to this ridiculously nice hotel right on the Harbor.

Friday night we went to the Apple Store and I got an iPhone! Cellular One has been a really bad service, so for those of you interested don't get it. Anyway, we spent basically all weekend trying to hack the iPhone, so I could use it with Cellular One and didn't have to change plans. In the end we both (and by we, I mean Andrew) failed miserably. I decided that I would just go ahead and get AT&T. What the hell? 

Anyway, we met up with Laura, which was a lot of fun. We went to lunch on the Harbor, followed by a Starbucks stop in Barnes & Noble, before we walked Laura back to the Metro stop.

But anyway, we all had a great time this weekend, even though Laura was only with us for a few hours on Saturday. Hopefully, we'll be able to hang out with her longer than that in the future. I definitely foresee relaxing weekends away from WVU, at the Inner Harbor happening again in my future. 

Peace out homies!

J. Bernard Machen's Response To Me

So I wrote a letter to president J. Bernard Machen, expressing my personal opinion on the videos and reports regarding that disgusting portrayal of law enforcement (see post below). Below is my letter to the president followed by his response.

My letter to President Machen:

President Machen,
I am a student in my fourth year at West Virginia University, and
would like to express my view on the subject of Matt Meyer's arrest.
Though I am not sure where you stand, and I doubt that my e-mail will
contribute to any sort of conclusion of your opinion on the subject,
I feel that as a 21 year old college student, I am affected by this
circumstance, albeit indirectly.

I was not there during the situation, so I can only attest to what
I've seen through media outlets, such as The Huffington Post, as well
as your official letter to students on the home page of the
University of Florida.

I am sure that there are many complicated issues and rights
surrounding this situation, but I could not understand what Mr. Meyer
was doing to deserve being seized by police. Yes, I've watched the
video over and over again, but still can not see any clear evidence
of any illegalities. Though asking questions is usually frowned upon
by many governing forces, Mr. Kerry seemed more than willing to
answer the question, and not threatened by the situation, in my opinion.
Because I am an English major here at WVU, my free speech First
Amendment right is constantly exercised and encouraged. I also feel
that everyone, including Mr. Meyer, who as far as I know attends the
University of Florida, deserves this right equally.

After the dust has settled I would only hope that you, the
administration of the University of Florida, and/or Sen. John Kerry
would give Mr. Meyer the opportunity to finish asking his question,
about which he felt so passionately.

Thank you for taking the time out of what I am sure is your very
busy, and hectic schedule to read this e-mail. I look forward to
hearing from you soon.


Respectfully,
John N. Thrasher

President Machen's response to me:

Good afternoon,

Your message was among those I have received since Monday afternoon when
University of Florida student Andrew Meyer was tasered and arrested at a
town hall forum held by Sen. John Kerry.

I want you to know I hear you loud and clear and share many of your
concerns. What I regret most of all about the incident that occurred
during a political forum is the lack of civil discourse, which is the
keystone of an academic institution such as ours.

We have begun several steps to gain a full understanding of how events
unfolded on Monday and to determine what protocols need changing.
Students and faculty will play an active role in this process, and every
aspect will be open to public review. We have not and will not assign
blame until the investigation is complete.

Updates will be posted regularly on www.ufl.edu.

We appreciate your patience as we allow the process to take its course.

Sincerely,

J. Bernard Machen
President, University of Florida

Seems a bit like a generated response, but it did take a few days before I received it so maybe he did actually write it to me. Who knows. I thought it was worth mentioning at least for those of you that read the blog earlier.

A Disgusting Portrayal of Law Enforcement

There are a lot of stupid things happening in this country, and I wanted to share some of it for you. Some of you think this guy was being a jackass. I thought for a second that yeah, maybe he was a bit emotional, but then I watched the entire question being asked. The police follow this guy to the microphone before he even opens his mouth. Even John Kerry says that it's alright and he would like to listen to the rest of the question. 

I'll follow this up with as much info as I can find, because it made me sick to watch it.

Click here to read the article that makes the most sense on the Huffington Post.

The 2007 MTV Video Music Awards

...were lame.

MTV hyped the shit out of Britney Spears' performance that was to open the show today. I was actually really excited, considering that there were at least 3 other performances from her that really stuck out in my head. This one was LAME! First, the camera begins with her just standing off-center on the stage. She actually loses her balance a little bit as she starts to walk, if you notice. Feel free to check it out here on YouTube. Then, she just walked across the stage...then back...and then the song was over. 

This could have been a huge way for her to come back but she definitely didn't do anything impressive at all.

I turned the TV off after I saw that disaster.