My Summer 2008

I wasn't sure which picture should accompany this post because I have taken more pictures this summer than any other summer. But, the one here is of the bracelets that Doug, Tommy, Lauren, and Jen gave to me and C'Anna as parting gifts when we were in San Remo. I had realized then that I hadn't been given something so simple yet so meaningful in my life. I still wear mine along with a rainbow bracelet that will keep me with my uncle who passed away in 2007. His daughter, my cousin in the recently posted video said she saw him in a rainbow in her dreams the day after he passed away.

This summer was ridiculous. I've never been through such a roller coaster of physical and mental peaks and valleys before. But, I guess that's what it's all about isn't it? We all sort of hope that we live these types of lives, and I have to say I have been absolutely blessed with the things that have happened to me this summer.

I won my first singles tournament in the beginning, which really kick-started it all. It's not a huge deal, but considering I nearly withdrew after the first round because of my disappointing practices, I would like to call it an achievement.

Then of course, I flew away to Italy. I found out literally 3 weeks before I left that I would be going. It was on a whim, and if we're being completely honest, I had been out drinking and sent the e-mail to be considered when I got back at approximately 4a.m. 3 weeks later I was on a plane to Italy where my life would change dramatically in a matter of 4 weeks.

This summer I met so many amazing people that will forever change the way I look at human beings. They've made me realize that there is more to the world than where I am in the moment. As Abi said, "Right now you are in a bubble, and you will soon pop it and see the world a lot more differently." She couldn't be more right.

San Remo will forever be a week in my life that will hold the record for most exciting, happy, beautiful, energetic, soulful, gorgeous memory of my life. I have outlined this before, but meeting Tommy, Doug, Lauren and Jen was not only amazing when it happened, but it has turned out to develop in to something that's truly ineffable. I can say now with much certainty that they will always be huge parts of my life, and I can't wait to see what the next step is.

I plan on writing full length posts about each of them just so people realize how beautiful they are and what kind of impact they have made on my life. I'm addicted to them. It's probably weird by now how much I talk about them but it's true.

My 2 weeks in Rome felt like I never left home. By the middle of the first week, it had felt like I had lived there my whole life. When I get back home in the States and look back at pictures, journals and anecdotes, it almost feels like I should be back there, doing what I need to do. I became so comfortable with my surroundings that I had no problem there. If I could tackle the language barrier, I would consider living there. Sam was a great guy, and I am really glad to have met him. I became particularly close to Rafael...my husband as I like to call him. I don't think he appreciates it as much as he says, but he can deal with it or he gets mace in the face.

Oh, Milan. So, the last week of June, I was in Milan for fun. I don't really know what to say about it except it made me realize how beautiful people can actually be. Sitting around a penthouse with my best friend, and 10 or so other people that I have known for less than a month and being in complete comfort, camaraderie, and trust is a feeling that is unmatched anywhere. Five days, and a few particularly close relationships later, and I'm walking to my bus stop to fly home bawling my eyes out. Hugging Abi goodbye was the hardest part of my trip. I'll never forget walking over and seeing her sleeping on the rooftop with the sun just coming up, and looking just like an angel. I didn't want to wake her because I knew it would soon be something so much different. Seeing her cry made me never want to leave. I'll never forget that.

Home was like getting hit by a ton of bricks - make that 20 tons of bricks. Not only was I depressed about being away from the people that helped change my life, but I had so much to deal with in preparation for school. It was just one thing after the other. Why couldn't I just be sitting on that rooftop again? Why couldn't I be laughing my ass off at people reacting to C'Anna threatening to spray them with mace? Why couldn't I be staring in to brown eyes? Why couldn't I get that child-like giddy feeling of seeing my favorite people again on a daily basis? I'll never know why I live here and put myself through this misery known as school, but I assure you there are big changes coming this May. I don't care if I have 1 credit left to graduate in May. I'm finished.

Canada was an experience. I got to take these 4 figments of my imagination, and put them in real life settings, with real-life families, and real-life living situations, and real-life problems. I think that's part of why I am struggling with being home...I don't get to be a part of these daily routines, and it bothers me tremendously. I was just telling someone recently about how I want to go to where I am happy. I want to be around things that make me happy. Who doesn't? I have an ipportunity ahead of me to be where I am happy and I think I'm going to take advantage of it. May can't come soon enough.

So another fall semester is about to begin. How many is this now? I don't even want to think about it. But what I am going to think about is making it my last couple of months here before I start something new - something else life changing.