So today ended up being my first day of actual classes. I had some scheduling conflicts (and alarm clock conflicts) that have since been resolved.
My first class was British Literature 2. It was with a professor I have never had before, and I was unusually nervous for some reason. Anyway, there was a girl standing outside of the classroom with me, and I asked her if she had British Lit 2 in this room at 2:30 and she was like, "HEY!!! YEAH!" A little twitch of terror went through my body at first because she was so excited that I asked her a question, but it soon subsided. She goes on to say, "So what did you get in the...ugh...you know..." and gestures towards a classroom on the other side of the hallway. Turns out that that classroom was where I had my Non-Western World Lit class last semester. Then, suddenly it hit me that she was in that class with me, and that is the reason she was so "OMFG" about me asking her a question. So I figure everything out in my head at the same exact instance, to which I reply, "Oh yeah...I actually got an A in it," and gave a polite smile.
So her "OMFG" attitude dimmed to a frown and then just as quickly back to a smile and she says, "Oh really!?!??!!?! I freaking failed it! I didn't even go to the final, it was at like 8am, and I'm like fuck this."
It doesn't process in my head what she is saying because the whole time she was just talking to me, my eyes were fixed on her shirt which read, "You looked better on MySpace." Still completely amazed that someone would have the audacity to wear a shirt like that, I followed her in to the room and recounted what she had just said to me.
So, class started and it seems like it is going to be a pretty difficult class. I end up sitting next to her, and being in a group with her. We had to take the book that 1 out of 5 of us had, and answer questions on this sheet that the professor handed out to us. Fittingly, she had the book. So, she looked for the answers. The first question asked, "What is the time period of Romanticism." You know...dates.
As in numbers.
After about 10 minutes of no one talking, I sit there (annoyed mind you because I don't have a book and can't find the answers myself...not to mention the wireless wasn't working in the room so I couldn't even get my iBook out and Google the shit) and notice that she started to write something. Naturally, everyone in the group looked up to see what she was writing. One guy asked, "Oh so, like, what did you get for the time period of Romanticism."
I look down at her paper, and she has written (and I swear to God people, I don't make this shit up),
"1780-Romantic Mountains"
"What the hell does that mean?" mumbles the scary bush faced man behind me that was in my group.
"Well I don't know, I was just looking through the preface [pronounced pree-face] and...it just looks right. I don't know it just looks right," she says with confidence.
I couldn't believe it. What does this mean? I couldn't even come to a hypothesis about what she was writing. It asks for dates and she writes "Romantic Mountains!?!?!"
Finally by the mercy of God, the professor was ready to discuss answers before I started embarassing this girl by laughing in her face. She definitly made my first day of classes to say the least.
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Person of the Day: Johnny Cooper (My Brother from Another Mother)
Honestly, words can't really describe my emotions when it comes to Johnny because I love him that much. And I'm an English major, so that's saying something.
Johnny has been one of the few friends in my life that has stood beside me consistantly without rebuttle, since probably 8th grade. We have been through so much together. We had the privelege to officially consider each other family as of last December when Dayvion was brought in to our worlds. Although, I think I had always been a part of his family. He has been blessed with the most amazing parents in the world that would do anything for him, no matter what. Because of this, Johnny is more than generous and will do anything for his friends.
All we do is sit around and make fun of each other and then laugh uncontrollably. I talk to him more while I am at school than I do most of my friends that are here with me. It's kind of ridiculous.
Johnny is also one of the most ambitious people I have ever met. He knows what it takes to achieve the goals that he sets in life, and that's one thing that I admire about him. He knows how to set trends, and examples and is classy in doing so. He is gonna do big thangs in life, so if you all don't know him yet you better get to it. He's going to take the music industry by storm and you're all gonna wanna piece of it just because you know me but you don't actually know me like that. HAHAHA!
We are closer now more than ever and I can honestly say that he is my best friend. I am blessed to have such an amazing, generous, talented, supportive, understanding, open-minded best friend in my life.
He's going to change the world.
Johnny has been one of the few friends in my life that has stood beside me consistantly without rebuttle, since probably 8th grade. We have been through so much together. We had the privelege to officially consider each other family as of last December when Dayvion was brought in to our worlds. Although, I think I had always been a part of his family. He has been blessed with the most amazing parents in the world that would do anything for him, no matter what. Because of this, Johnny is more than generous and will do anything for his friends.
All we do is sit around and make fun of each other and then laugh uncontrollably. I talk to him more while I am at school than I do most of my friends that are here with me. It's kind of ridiculous.
Johnny is also one of the most ambitious people I have ever met. He knows what it takes to achieve the goals that he sets in life, and that's one thing that I admire about him. He knows how to set trends, and examples and is classy in doing so. He is gonna do big thangs in life, so if you all don't know him yet you better get to it. He's going to take the music industry by storm and you're all gonna wanna piece of it just because you know me but you don't actually know me like that. HAHAHA!
We are closer now more than ever and I can honestly say that he is my best friend. I am blessed to have such an amazing, generous, talented, supportive, understanding, open-minded best friend in my life.
He's going to change the world.
Sunday, December 17, 2006
Person of the Day: Tanya Sanders (My Therapist)
Well, Tanya isn't my actual therapist, but she might as well have a doctorate in the damn study because she is the best advice-giver and listener I've ever met.
How do I know Tanya? She is my last roommate's best friend. Tanya just exemplifies what it means to be a friend in every sense of the word. I first met her while I was at Frostburg, when my last roommate introduced me to her. Since then, we've hit it off, and she has really been one of my best friends.
Anytime I have a story I need to tell, she listens, and laughs, and gives me feedback. Anytime I am having a bad day and I call her, she is there to listen and give me support and advice on how to make my day better. I'm sure some of her skills were achieved during her training to become a teacher. However, her huge heart, unmatched personality and soothing voice are intangibles that can not be denied.
Tanya, living hundreds of miles away in another country, never lets the distance be an issue for her friends. She is more than willing to travel to experience that human interaction that seems to be lost with a lot of people these days. Last year, Tanya even remembered my birthday and sent me a card which arrived on my birthday! ! She is so amazing.
Another thing that will bring Tanya and myself together in the afterlife is that we are both infatuated with Harry Potter. I can recall many in depth analytical conversations about Harry Potter with her. Unfortunately, I am not able to find these with many people in my life. Thus, I appreciate this friendship to a whole other degree! ;)
Many people reading this probably will never have the opportunity to meet Tanya, as she lives in Canada. But let me tell you that you are definitely missing out in life if you don't know her. I can't say enough good things about her. She is just one of the most all around amazing people I have ever had the privelege to know.
So, Tanya if you are reading this, I hope you and your family have an amazing holiday! Thank you so much for being one of my best friends in life. I love you! :)
How do I know Tanya? She is my last roommate's best friend. Tanya just exemplifies what it means to be a friend in every sense of the word. I first met her while I was at Frostburg, when my last roommate introduced me to her. Since then, we've hit it off, and she has really been one of my best friends.
Anytime I have a story I need to tell, she listens, and laughs, and gives me feedback. Anytime I am having a bad day and I call her, she is there to listen and give me support and advice on how to make my day better. I'm sure some of her skills were achieved during her training to become a teacher. However, her huge heart, unmatched personality and soothing voice are intangibles that can not be denied.
Tanya, living hundreds of miles away in another country, never lets the distance be an issue for her friends. She is more than willing to travel to experience that human interaction that seems to be lost with a lot of people these days. Last year, Tanya even remembered my birthday and sent me a card which arrived on my birthday! ! She is so amazing.
Another thing that will bring Tanya and myself together in the afterlife is that we are both infatuated with Harry Potter. I can recall many in depth analytical conversations about Harry Potter with her. Unfortunately, I am not able to find these with many people in my life. Thus, I appreciate this friendship to a whole other degree! ;)
Many people reading this probably will never have the opportunity to meet Tanya, as she lives in Canada. But let me tell you that you are definitely missing out in life if you don't know her. I can't say enough good things about her. She is just one of the most all around amazing people I have ever had the privelege to know.
So, Tanya if you are reading this, I hope you and your family have an amazing holiday! Thank you so much for being one of my best friends in life. I love you! :)
Saturday, December 16, 2006
Person of the Day: Isaiah (My Roommate)
It's been a while since I have posted to my blog. There isn't a reason other than the fact that I am too lazy to type in all of the information that blogger.com now asks to input just to get in here. It's kind of ridiculous really.
So, now it's almost Christmas and I'm really excited. It's kind of early in the morning and I am trying to think of ways to honor my friends. I really have amazing friends. I have truely been blessed with the people in my life. As an aspiring writer, I think that the best way to honor my friends is to write about them!
So, starting today I will write about someone each day until Christmas. It can be called John's 9 Days of Awesome People, or something like that. Today I will begin writing about one of the best people I've ever met...my roommate Isaiah Smith.
Isaiah and I met way back in middle school when he had a mustache. Now, Isaiah doesn't rock the mustache, but he's still just as attractive. He used to make fun of me for playing the cello back then, but I didn't realize it. I was just like, "Yeah playing the cello is awesome!" and then talk about it for like 10 minutes while he laughed in my face. However, as time went on we became very good friends in high school. One day I was playing tennis with my friend Andrew Clark, and he went to serve a ball and his racquet flew out of his hand and crunched in to the ground. Likewise, Andrew had to go home. However on the other courts, Isaiah and my friend Jason Wigfield were also playing tennis. Naturally, Andrew left, and I stayed and asked Jason if I could play with him and Isaiah. Anyway to make a long story short, it was the birth of my friendship with Jason, my friendship with Isaiah, and eventually my love and passion for tennis, as both of them are vital parts of my tennis success.
Throughout our high school years Isaiah and I became pretty good friends. We had a few classes together, I think. I ran for class president my junior year and Isaiah had the balls to actually tell me that he didn't vote for me. But that's alright because I still won and I admired him for being honest even if he did support terrorists. We played on the tennis team our senior year together, and had a few classes. We actually discussed being roommates together throughout high school because we wanted to go to the same schools. However, by the time our freshman year of college came around, we both went our different ways due to different reasons.
Now, however...we have seen our idea of being roommates come to fruition. Finally, Isaiah transferred to the best school in the world (WVU) and this summer signed a lease that contracted us to deal with each other on a day-to-day basis.
I must say, considering my roommate situations in the past, this has been one of the most amazing experiences of my life. Isaiah and I are now closer than ever. We always said we considered each other brothers, and now it really feels that way. We have similar upbringings, and similar views on life. But, we both have a lot to offer each other. I think the best part about being roommates has been we make each other laugh so much. Laughing and having fun is such a huge part of both of our lives, and we both give each other just the right dosage. We have had no major conflicts whatsoever, and it's been an absolute blast.
Another amazing thing about Isaiah is that he bought me a Nintendo DS Lite for Christmas! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!? I mean I got him some DVD's that I knew he would really like, but he definitely did his homework. I've been wanting a DS and a game called "Brain Age" for a while now. It just shows that he really puts a lot of thought in to his gifts for people. What did your roommate get you? Oh a toaster? That sucks. Does it connect to WiFi? Didn't think so.
Anyway, if those of you that are reading this don't know who Isaiah Smith is, let me know and I will introduce you to him. He is an amazing person, with a huge heart, and a lot of passion for life. He's my brother, and one of my best friends, and I am more than thankful to have him in my life this Christmas, and always! :)
*Note: If you are reading this via Facebook, check out my actual blog where you can see the photos that are added and not just the text. http://thrash5.blogspot.com
Monday, October 23, 2006
Foley Me Twice...Shame On Me!
Okay, it's time that I address this ridiculous Mark Foley ordeal.
I understand that the fact that Mark Foley sent scandalous e-mails and instant messages to some pages and I understand that he is a republican. But, is it REALLY that big of a deal? I don't understand why the fact that some republican sent some messages to a page is the reasons why Congress hasn't been doing anything this whole time. It's not folks. Mark Foley does not represent the actions of every single other republican in Congress. Democrats understandabely so, have used it as a platform, and to a lot of mindless Americans that don't see the real issues with which everyone is annoyed about, will use the Foley case as their means of voting.
But really, let's shut up about Mark Foley. Yes, let him deal with the fact that he was wrong, but we as voters can't say, "Oh wow Mark Foley sent messages to teenagers...clearly he's the reason October was the bloodiest month in Iraq, and the reason nothing is getting done in Congress." I'm not saying what Foley did was right, but please don't go vote in a few weeks based on the idea that someone sent e-mails and instant messages to another guy. Whoopy Doo. Let's get to the real reason behind the issues. Please.
I understand that the fact that Mark Foley sent scandalous e-mails and instant messages to some pages and I understand that he is a republican. But, is it REALLY that big of a deal? I don't understand why the fact that some republican sent some messages to a page is the reasons why Congress hasn't been doing anything this whole time. It's not folks. Mark Foley does not represent the actions of every single other republican in Congress. Democrats understandabely so, have used it as a platform, and to a lot of mindless Americans that don't see the real issues with which everyone is annoyed about, will use the Foley case as their means of voting.
But really, let's shut up about Mark Foley. Yes, let him deal with the fact that he was wrong, but we as voters can't say, "Oh wow Mark Foley sent messages to teenagers...clearly he's the reason October was the bloodiest month in Iraq, and the reason nothing is getting done in Congress." I'm not saying what Foley did was right, but please don't go vote in a few weeks based on the idea that someone sent e-mails and instant messages to another guy. Whoopy Doo. Let's get to the real reason behind the issues. Please.
Monday, October 09, 2006
A Public Service Announcement (Not For the Faint of Heart)
This may offend some of you, and for that I am sorry. However, it has to be said.
Every Sunday I arrive to the downtown library around 6:45, because I begin working at 7. I have to change before I get there, which is why I arrive early. Of course it would make sense that I would have to change in the (public) bathrooms that are available on each floor of the library.
My journey begins on the 4th floor, because this is where I report for work. A little annoyed at what I know is to come, I begin walking in to the bathroom. To my surprise (not really) the stalls are occupied by men taking gigantic man-dumps. Stop it.
This is where my frustration mutates in to an issue.
Because...now, not only have I been neglected two perfectly fine stalls, but I now have the following pathetic options (and I don't deal well with ultimatums in public settings):
A) I can stand around awkwardly in the bathroom while I sniff the human methane that is suffocating me, and wait until one of them becomes unoccupied...in which case, it's INCREDIBELY awkward because you don't just want to smile and be like, "Hi. Excuse me. Thanks! I'm just going to walk right in to this stall you just stunk up and breathe really hard. No, yeah, it doesn't smell that bad. It's fine. No really, it's fine I don't mind it at all," and walk in to the cloud of ass that remains and is lingering behind.
or
B) I can just exit the bathroom, and go to another floor where the possibility of the same exact situation looms. However, this option requires AT LEAST one required flight of stairs to climb. I'm sorry but I'm not walking anymore flights of stairs on this campus if I can help it. I shouldn't put myself through some sort of physical disturbance just because some guy from southern West Virginia is pushing a calf out in one of the stalls and creating some sort of mini-hazard zone. I'm sorry. I'm not going to do that.
Regardless of what option I choose, I'm in a bad situation. If I take option A, then it speaks for itself. If I take option B, then okay yeah, a stall might be open, but odds are there are some lingering odors that I'm going to have to deal with anyway. And, let's not get in to the possibility of a clogged toilet.
I guess of course I could just always change before I get there but I am always in a rush to get there because I need to find a parking space. Speaking of which, I got my third parking citation today in 3 weeks. The new total is up to like 10 or 50...somewhere in there.
Anyway, for further reference...
Guys: Please stop taking dumps in the library. I mean if it's an emergency, then it makes sense. But stop reading the paper in there. Stop text messaging in there. Stop picking your nose in there. Stop listening to your iPod in there. Stop reading the book you just checked out in the lobby in there. Just don't. It's gross, and it creates very disgusting and awkward feelings for most of us that use it for alternative purposes.
Bottom line: You just don't take a shit in public.
So, next time, get it all out before you get to the library. Read the book you just checked out, when you get home. Everything will be just fine!
Does this qualify as a G-Thought? :)
Every Sunday I arrive to the downtown library around 6:45, because I begin working at 7. I have to change before I get there, which is why I arrive early. Of course it would make sense that I would have to change in the (public) bathrooms that are available on each floor of the library.
My journey begins on the 4th floor, because this is where I report for work. A little annoyed at what I know is to come, I begin walking in to the bathroom. To my surprise (not really) the stalls are occupied by men taking gigantic man-dumps. Stop it.
This is where my frustration mutates in to an issue.
Because...now, not only have I been neglected two perfectly fine stalls, but I now have the following pathetic options (and I don't deal well with ultimatums in public settings):
A) I can stand around awkwardly in the bathroom while I sniff the human methane that is suffocating me, and wait until one of them becomes unoccupied...in which case, it's INCREDIBELY awkward because you don't just want to smile and be like, "Hi. Excuse me. Thanks! I'm just going to walk right in to this stall you just stunk up and breathe really hard. No, yeah, it doesn't smell that bad. It's fine. No really, it's fine I don't mind it at all," and walk in to the cloud of ass that remains and is lingering behind.
or
B) I can just exit the bathroom, and go to another floor where the possibility of the same exact situation looms. However, this option requires AT LEAST one required flight of stairs to climb. I'm sorry but I'm not walking anymore flights of stairs on this campus if I can help it. I shouldn't put myself through some sort of physical disturbance just because some guy from southern West Virginia is pushing a calf out in one of the stalls and creating some sort of mini-hazard zone. I'm sorry. I'm not going to do that.
Regardless of what option I choose, I'm in a bad situation. If I take option A, then it speaks for itself. If I take option B, then okay yeah, a stall might be open, but odds are there are some lingering odors that I'm going to have to deal with anyway. And, let's not get in to the possibility of a clogged toilet.
I guess of course I could just always change before I get there but I am always in a rush to get there because I need to find a parking space. Speaking of which, I got my third parking citation today in 3 weeks. The new total is up to like 10 or 50...somewhere in there.
Anyway, for further reference...
Guys: Please stop taking dumps in the library. I mean if it's an emergency, then it makes sense. But stop reading the paper in there. Stop text messaging in there. Stop picking your nose in there. Stop listening to your iPod in there. Stop reading the book you just checked out in the lobby in there. Just don't. It's gross, and it creates very disgusting and awkward feelings for most of us that use it for alternative purposes.
Bottom line: You just don't take a shit in public.
So, next time, get it all out before you get to the library. Read the book you just checked out, when you get home. Everything will be just fine!
Does this qualify as a G-Thought? :)
Friday, October 06, 2006
Rain, Pain, and Gain
Ew today was absolutely mother f*cking disgusting. Not only because it rained ALL day and it was freezing, and the worst weather I've ever seen, but also because I had a mid-term exam. However, I defeated the weather that would had usually brought me down, and I think I did really well on my exam.
I woke up and it was one of those days where you just don't want to get out of bed, no matter what the fascist Hitler-voice in your head is saying to you. But I did. And I couldn't get that just-woke-up face off. I looked like I just woke up all day.
I was taking my exam, and had a question for my professor. I walked up to her and her crossword puzzle and when she looked up at me, she kind of jumped back a bit. Like, one of those, "oh my" jumps. Or one of those, "Oh-my-f*cking-God-this-kid-is-a-fat-oompa-loompa" jumps. Either way, I walked away rolling my eyes at her ignorant expression.
In other, fitter news, I ran 3.5 miles last night. It's not a lot but I'm getting there. My fat on my stomach was being thrashed up and down as I would run, and it ended up giving me a stomach ache from the repitition. It's really sad, but at least I am working on getting rid of it.
Duh.
I woke up and it was one of those days where you just don't want to get out of bed, no matter what the fascist Hitler-voice in your head is saying to you. But I did. And I couldn't get that just-woke-up face off. I looked like I just woke up all day.
I was taking my exam, and had a question for my professor. I walked up to her and her crossword puzzle and when she looked up at me, she kind of jumped back a bit. Like, one of those, "oh my" jumps. Or one of those, "Oh-my-f*cking-God-this-kid-is-a-fat-oompa-loompa" jumps. Either way, I walked away rolling my eyes at her ignorant expression.
In other, fitter news, I ran 3.5 miles last night. It's not a lot but I'm getting there. My fat on my stomach was being thrashed up and down as I would run, and it ended up giving me a stomach ache from the repitition. It's really sad, but at least I am working on getting rid of it.
Duh.
Thursday, September 28, 2006
John's G-Thoughts
As I sit here at my desk with the latest issue of GQ which has a headline that reads, "We Finally Found the G-Spot! Complete Map on Page 260," I realize that I REALLY wish my life had a G-Spot.
We all have our respective G-Spots, indeed. It's that spot on or in all human beings, that when penetrated the right way, makes you want to...well...giggle, if you will. (I'm trying to keep it G-rated!)
So I am looking at my map of life (which is just a straight line in my mind)...and I want to find my life's G-spot. Where is it? Where can I find it? I want to be able to know where it is so when I find this "spot" I can...push...and shove and capitalize on the fact that I have finally found bliss, and amazement in my life. I can tell you that Morgantown is not my life's G-spot. I love this place, but it's more like...the scrotum of my life. It holds precious things, but in the end it's just kind of gross.
What I am getting at here, is while I am really happy here in Morgantown, there are things about it that make me really sad. Why does traffic make me late for any single thing to which I need to be driving? Why do I get a parking ticket when I have a permit in my windshield? Why, no matter what, do I never feel like I have enough money? Why are girls STILL wearing Ugg boots? Why does WVU have popularity contests? Where is the love of my life? Is the love of my life my G-spot? Is my G-spot an object, or is it a thought? Maybe it's my G-thought! Did I really just type that? It has a nice little ring to it though, doesn't it?
From now on when I think of something amazing, I'm going to call it my G-thought. (c)
Anyway, I am bored and slightly annoyed at the direction in which my life is going right now. I want stability and reassurance. Is that too much to ask? Maybe not even 100% stability and reassurance, but something close to it.
Do I really think that I am going to be able to pay back these student loans when I am finished with college? Is the degree I am getting worth all the time, effort, stress, and personal setback that it has already given me, halfway through my college career?
I hope you all have something to be excited, proud about. Share it with me, so I can be excited for someone! :)
Personal note for future reference: John, today you will begin Phase 1 of Operation Shut Down. You know what I'm talking about. I mean, You know what you're talking about, since you are the one writing this.
We all have our respective G-Spots, indeed. It's that spot on or in all human beings, that when penetrated the right way, makes you want to...well...giggle, if you will. (I'm trying to keep it G-rated!)
So I am looking at my map of life (which is just a straight line in my mind)...and I want to find my life's G-spot. Where is it? Where can I find it? I want to be able to know where it is so when I find this "spot" I can...push...and shove and capitalize on the fact that I have finally found bliss, and amazement in my life. I can tell you that Morgantown is not my life's G-spot. I love this place, but it's more like...the scrotum of my life. It holds precious things, but in the end it's just kind of gross.
What I am getting at here, is while I am really happy here in Morgantown, there are things about it that make me really sad. Why does traffic make me late for any single thing to which I need to be driving? Why do I get a parking ticket when I have a permit in my windshield? Why, no matter what, do I never feel like I have enough money? Why are girls STILL wearing Ugg boots? Why does WVU have popularity contests? Where is the love of my life? Is the love of my life my G-spot? Is my G-spot an object, or is it a thought? Maybe it's my G-thought! Did I really just type that? It has a nice little ring to it though, doesn't it?
From now on when I think of something amazing, I'm going to call it my G-thought. (c)
Anyway, I am bored and slightly annoyed at the direction in which my life is going right now. I want stability and reassurance. Is that too much to ask? Maybe not even 100% stability and reassurance, but something close to it.
Do I really think that I am going to be able to pay back these student loans when I am finished with college? Is the degree I am getting worth all the time, effort, stress, and personal setback that it has already given me, halfway through my college career?
I hope you all have something to be excited, proud about. Share it with me, so I can be excited for someone! :)
Personal note for future reference: John, today you will begin Phase 1 of Operation Shut Down. You know what I'm talking about. I mean, You know what you're talking about, since you are the one writing this.
As I sit here at my desk with the latest issue of GQ which has a headline that reads, "We Finally Found the G-Spot! Complete Map on Page 260," I realize that I REALLY wish my life had a G-Spot.
We all have our respective G-Spots, indeed. It's that spot on or in all human beings, that when penetrated the right way, makes you want to...well...giggle, if you will. (I'm trying to keep it G-rated!)
So I am looking at my map of life (which is just a straight line in my mind)...and I want to find my life's G-spot. Where is it? Where can I find it? I want to be able to know where it is so when I find this "spot" I can...push...and shove and capitalize on the fact that I have finally found bliss, and amazement in my life. I can tell you that Morgantown is not my life's G-spot. I love this place, but it's more like...the scrotum of my life. It holds precious things, but in the end it's just kind of gross.
What I am getting at here, is while I am really happy here in Morgantown, there are things about it that make me really sad. Why does traffic make me late for any single thing to which I need to be driving? Why do I get a parking ticket when I have a permit in my windshield? Why, no matter what, do I never feel like I have enough money? Why are girls STILL wearing Ugg boots? Why does WVU have popularity contests? Where is the love of my life? Is the love of my life my G-spot? Is my G-spot an object, or is it a thought? Maybe it's my G-thought! Did I really just type that? It has a nice little ring to it though, doesn't it?
From now on when I think of something amazing, I'm going to call it my G-thought. (c)
Anyway, I am bored and slightly annoyed at the direction in which my life is going right now. I want stability and reassurance. Is that too much to ask? Maybe not even 100% stability and reassurance, but something close to it.
Do I really think that I am going to be able to pay back these student loans when I am finished with college? Is the degree I am getting worth all the time, effort, stress, and personal setback that it has already given me, halfway through my college career?
I hope you all have something to be excited, proud about. Share it with me, so I can be excited for someone! :)
Personal note for future reference: John, today you will begin Phase 1 of Operation Shut Down. You know what I'm talking about. I mean, You know what you're talking about, since you are the one writing this.
We all have our respective G-Spots, indeed. It's that spot on or in all human beings, that when penetrated the right way, makes you want to...well...giggle, if you will. (I'm trying to keep it G-rated!)
So I am looking at my map of life (which is just a straight line in my mind)...and I want to find my life's G-spot. Where is it? Where can I find it? I want to be able to know where it is so when I find this "spot" I can...push...and shove and capitalize on the fact that I have finally found bliss, and amazement in my life. I can tell you that Morgantown is not my life's G-spot. I love this place, but it's more like...the scrotum of my life. It holds precious things, but in the end it's just kind of gross.
What I am getting at here, is while I am really happy here in Morgantown, there are things about it that make me really sad. Why does traffic make me late for any single thing to which I need to be driving? Why do I get a parking ticket when I have a permit in my windshield? Why, no matter what, do I never feel like I have enough money? Why are girls STILL wearing Ugg boots? Why does WVU have popularity contests? Where is the love of my life? Is the love of my life my G-spot? Is my G-spot an object, or is it a thought? Maybe it's my G-thought! Did I really just type that? It has a nice little ring to it though, doesn't it?
From now on when I think of something amazing, I'm going to call it my G-thought. (c)
Anyway, I am bored and slightly annoyed at the direction in which my life is going right now. I want stability and reassurance. Is that too much to ask? Maybe not even 100% stability and reassurance, but something close to it.
Do I really think that I am going to be able to pay back these student loans when I am finished with college? Is the degree I am getting worth all the time, effort, stress, and personal setback that it has already given me, halfway through my college career?
I hope you all have something to be excited, proud about. Share it with me, so I can be excited for someone! :)
Personal note for future reference: John, today you will begin Phase 1 of Operation Shut Down. You know what I'm talking about. I mean, You know what you're talking about, since you are the one writing this.
Monday, September 18, 2006
Do You Ever Wanna Splash Scorching Hot Coffee In Someone's Face?
Great! Then you will be able to relate to me here.
I work at a Starbucks brewery at the downtown library at West Virginia University...and I love it to death. I work with some awesome people that make me laugh very hard.
However, every once in a while a prick will have the bad luck of being one of my customers in line. There is a particular jerk that comes in with his XXL t-shirt with his Motorola Pebl phone on his ear, and is just a complete ass to whomever answers him. He doesn't say, "Could I please have a venti vanilla latte," or "Could I please have every single muffin, bagel and cookie in the display case please, I'm fat and really need to eat everything I see."
Instead he says, "I want a venti vanilla latte." Semi-throws his credit card at me. And walks away.
. . .
Now, listen here. I don't know about you but I try to be as cordial of a person as I can, no matter what the situation is. I think that as long as I am polite, and respectful to people, they will be the same to me. So, I take a breath, and get my milk-a-steamin' and continue doing what I do best...steam milk.
So, as I am making his latte, Hefty waddles back over to the counter with the phone still to his ear, and asks me "What time does this place close?" To which I reply, "Midnight."
...and the f*cker rolls his eyes!
. . .
What?
. . .
This shit head is going to roll his ugly shit brown eyes at me as I am making him his gormet coffee?
I don't think so!
So, unfortunately for him I decided to steam his milk to 200 degrees instead of the standard 160. I think that's close to like evaporating or turning in to carbon milkoxide or something like that, but I don't care. I just a'kept on steamin' that shit with this unhealthy serial killer look in my eyes.
I handed him his venti-200 degree-vanilla-I-hope-it-dissolves-your-insides-it's-so-hot-latte to him, and he jerks it off the counter and walks away in a queeny-snap-your-fingers-and-say, "No he didn't"-attitude, and that was the end of the night.
I love my job.
I work at a Starbucks brewery at the downtown library at West Virginia University...and I love it to death. I work with some awesome people that make me laugh very hard.
However, every once in a while a prick will have the bad luck of being one of my customers in line. There is a particular jerk that comes in with his XXL t-shirt with his Motorola Pebl phone on his ear, and is just a complete ass to whomever answers him. He doesn't say, "Could I please have a venti vanilla latte," or "Could I please have every single muffin, bagel and cookie in the display case please, I'm fat and really need to eat everything I see."
Instead he says, "I want a venti vanilla latte." Semi-throws his credit card at me. And walks away.
. . .
Now, listen here. I don't know about you but I try to be as cordial of a person as I can, no matter what the situation is. I think that as long as I am polite, and respectful to people, they will be the same to me. So, I take a breath, and get my milk-a-steamin' and continue doing what I do best...steam milk.
So, as I am making his latte, Hefty waddles back over to the counter with the phone still to his ear, and asks me "What time does this place close?" To which I reply, "Midnight."
...and the f*cker rolls his eyes!
. . .
What?
. . .
This shit head is going to roll his ugly shit brown eyes at me as I am making him his gormet coffee?
I don't think so!
So, unfortunately for him I decided to steam his milk to 200 degrees instead of the standard 160. I think that's close to like evaporating or turning in to carbon milkoxide or something like that, but I don't care. I just a'kept on steamin' that shit with this unhealthy serial killer look in my eyes.
I handed him his venti-200 degree-vanilla-I-hope-it-dissolves-your-insides-it's-so-hot-latte to him, and he jerks it off the counter and walks away in a queeny-snap-your-fingers-and-say, "No he didn't"-attitude, and that was the end of the night.
I love my job.
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